Today I’m delighted to introduce you to my friend Betsy St. Amant. She is delightful and her new book All’s Fair in Love & Cupcakes is a fun romantic comedy centered around a romance during a reality TV competition. I love her heart and I’m excited to share her with you.
Betsy, you’ve set this book around baking cupcakes. What’s your favorite kind of cupcake?
This is a really tricky question…because, well, I’ve never met a cupcake I didn’t get along with 🙂 But I think my favorite right now is pink lemonade cupcakes.
I love that you included the recipe in the book and can’t wait to make them. The heroine in this story is a gal I would love to hang out with. Yet Kat doesn’t see where she fits. Why did that become her struggle? What would you tell women like her if you could share coffee with them? Kat struggled a lot with insecurity and her place in the world because of the dynamics of her relationship with her sister, and with her family, and even with her best friend Lucas. They all seemed to have figured out their lives and here she was, doing the same ol’ thing over and over, stifled, yet afraid to branch out for fear she didn’t have what it took to succeed. I think a lot of women end up there – comparing themselves to others around them, holding their story up to their neighbor’s story and seeing it as falling short. I would encourage those women the same way I have to encourage myself – it’s not about comparison. Your story is your story, and it doesn’t matter where someone else is, or what they’re doing, or even about what God did or didn’t do in their life – He has a good plan for You and is going to do a work in your life for His glory. An incomparable work.
Lucas is trying to show Kat that he loves her but she’s just not getting the message. What advice would you give Lucas?
Lucas needs to learn that sometimes subtlety isn’t the best play! He’s always getting on to Kat for holding back and not spreading her wings to fly…yet when it comes to the things most important to Lucas’s heart, he, too, needs to learn not to hold back. Go big or go home, Lucas. Go big or go home!
Football places a big role in this book. Are you a fan or did you have to learn about the game as you wrote the book? If you’re a fan what’s your favorite team?
I’m a fan of my local teams, which are the New Orleans Saints and the LSU Tigers. I have the T-shirts and love the fellowship of getting together for a game and the friendly banter from opposing fans. I wouldn’t say I am a hardcore football fan, though, because I do watch the Superbowl strictly for the commercials 😉 I had to check with a few hardcore fans to get some terms and plays right and really get in Lucas’s head in this area. It was fun research though!
Betsy, you’ve gone through a really hard season, yet you still write about finding true love. What advice would you give to other women who are struggling in marriages that are failing? What has gotten you through this season?
Sometimes I feel like I’m out of this dark season and have found the other side and have a lot of advice to offer; yet other days, it feels like I just started this journey a week ago and have nothing to offer but empathetic tears. Which goes to show there is no formula to divorce. My husband left exactly one and a half years ago and our divorce was final four months ago. Yet those are just numbers that truly mean nothing to anyone other than a judge or a courthouse clerk filing documents.
It sort of reminds me how the Bible teaches that with God, a day is like a thousand years and a thousand years is like a day. He’s there with me on the days that feel as if this journey just started, and He’s with me on the days that feel like I am fully healed and whole again. And that’s really all that matters. His presence. That’s what has gotten me through this seemingly endless valley, and it’s also what has shown me glimpses of the mountain top peaks I am headed toward.
That’s my advice to other women struggling in their marriages or dealing with the pain or aftermath of divorce – immerse yourself in the Lord’s presence, every day, regardless of your ever-changing emotions and hormones and feelings. He is steady, constant and unchanging, and is the Rock we can cling to when the waves threaten to overwhelm. So regardless of if you’re having a day-day or a thousand-years-day, remember, the One who created time is Timeless. Be real and honest with Him, process your day with Him, and keep moving forward through the valley. The peaks are coming.