Monday Meditations: Finding God in the Pauses

Cara faith thoughts, life; faith 2 Comments

Tomorrow I head to ACFW, which means I’m a little swamped. So today I’m digging into the blog archives. This post is from 2012. As my fall is racing away from me, I found it poignant to look back at this post. In many ways, life is filled with seasons of waiting and pausing.
It’s so hard to savor those seasons. It’s often only in the looking back that I see God’s hand and wisdom in the pause.
A pause is a temporary stop or rest, but so often I focus on it as a hesitation because of fear or uncertainty. What if I could see it as that temporary stop? A moment to breathe because God knows activity is about to ramp up?
That possible end to 2012 summer plans? Led nowhere except two months in Germany. It was an out-of-this-world family experience. A highlight of my professional career.
That disappointing news from a publisher? I still get it. I still have to rework proposals. ALL. the. Time. But this month I start writing a book with my dream editor and publisher.
So let’s hear it for pauses, and the wisdom to look back and see why God hit pause…

In January, I received disappointing news from a publisher. It was one of those good rejections…the kind that said we’d love to work with you, but this book isn’t quite right yet. Lots of great feedback — which is so valuable. But still it was a no. A no that hurt after I’d let my heart hope that this was the right time.

Then a couple weeks ago, it looked like summer plans that we’ve had in the works since last fall were falling through….one of those God has to intervene or this is dead. I could see dreams spiraling toward death as I sat at my computer…stunned and if I’m honest…crying. Something I don’t do. Really.

I stared at my computer screen and kept asking God what He was up to. Then I had to go to church to lead a women’s Bible study — the timing was so ironic. After that I took a walk through the neighborhood, with more questions.

I’m still not 100% sure what God was and is up to. But I can tell you this…I have found a peace in the process.

He went out and killed one of His cows for us — you know one of those cattle on the thousand hills that He owns. That resurrected the summer plans and family dream while adding to the already pretty incredible testimony that will join the story.

Then I’ve got a proposal that’s about ready to go out with a couple of my favorite writing buddies. This project could be such a blast and ties back to my favorite time period. I wouldn’t have had time to pursue that if I’d been finalizing a contract.

God has reminded me through this process that He knew this spring was going to be crazy for us as a family and me personally. Teaching two new classes at the community college adds a level of complexity. Then there’s homeschooling. Gymnastics and the competitive season. Leading a Bible study at church. Dreaming. Trying to keep my head above water. Marketing my three spring releases.

Maybe He built this pause in to my schedule because He knows what happens otherwise. I won’t say no. Instead, I’ll find a way to do everything. So for now He built in a pause and I’ve reached a point of peace with that pause. I can’t wait to see what He has on the other side of this.

How about you? Do you ever since God building pauses into your days? How do you respond? Joy? Questions? Quiet faith?


Comments 2

  1. Much easier to see God in the pauses when we have no choice – health that puts us flat in bed, and for sure if it’s someone else. Me, no i probably just push through, though God would tell me to slow down and smell the roses. i’m praying for you, Cara. What am i praying? Just that you will continue to stay keen to the Spirit and close to His side.

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